I am still alive, but so tired!

I haven't been posting on here in a while (ok, maybe eight days is more than a while) but I have a really good excuse, I promise!  You see, I've been working in my yard.  It's been a work in progress since the first year we moved in.  The previous owners weren't so good with yard care, and so we've been pulling it into shape.  This is the first year where I've been able to plant new flowers, and I'm loving it!

Last weekend I put in my veggie garden, and it looks awesome!  Check it out:

Don't you love the labels?  I'm so proud of myself!

Here are some other pictures I took over this week of my yard:

I hope all of you are enjoying spring as much as I am!

A Lighthearted Post!

With all the anxiety and stress I've been blogging about forever lately, I thought I'd throw out a lighthearted story for you!

We moved in to our house two years ago this month (wow, it's gone by fast!) and after unloading everything into the house, I went upstairs to relax.  The area that we moved into has such a small town feel to it (seriously, people wave to strangers, and last week someone we didn't know brought us cookies!) that I felt it was ok to leave the door unlocked during the day. 

So after relaxing a bit, I decide to head downstairs to unpack the kitchen.  And there in the downstairs bathroom, is a little boy, maybe four or five, using my toilet!!  I saw him standing there, and quickly turned away. And this little boy didn't apologize or anything for being in my house.  I heard him zip up his pants, wash his hands and then he told me, matter of factly "My best friend used to live here.  His name was Steve, and we used to play all the time.  My name is Cannon.  Do you have any kids to play with me? Oh you have a dog, I like dogs" at which point he got on the floor and played with Moo.

I stood there shell shocked for a few seconds.  This little boy had walked into my house, used my bathroom, and was now on the floor with my dog.  I had to admire his tenacity!  Who just walks into someones house like that?  Eventually I bribed him out of our house with a popsicle. 

The whole first summer was filled with visits from Cannon, although I did learn to lock my door.  Of course, locking my door led to an unfortunate incident about 9 o'clock at night, when Cannon tried to come in, couldn't, and then banged on the door while screaming "I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!".  Me and my hubby turned off all of the lights and t.v. and laid really still until he left.

I also learned a great trick involving otter pops, you know those popsicles inside the plastic tube?  Whenever I wanted Cannon to leave, I'd give him an otter pop and tell him I couldn't find my scissors.  He'd always run home to have his mom cut them open for him. 

Of course, I'm now known as the popsicle lady to all of the little kids in the area.  Good thing otter pops are cheap!

Sorry for the short and downer post yesterday.  It was like getting smacked upside the head looking at only one line on that test.  But after eating cake for breakfast, listening to sad county music and crying, I felt more like myself.

Mother's Day ended up ok for me.  Me and my hubby went out to lunch with his Mom, and we had a blast.  His Dad had to leave yesterday for a week long business trip to Tulsa, so all of us kids are taking turns keeping Mom company.  She's such a sweet lady!

After lunch with my MIL we went and visited my Mom.  We had a lot of fun, and my husband even helped fix my Dad's computer (he's pretty much a computer genius).  It was a nice relaxing evening at their house.  On the way down to visit, I made a stop at my Grandma's grave and gave her some tulips from my yard.  That woman was my hero.  Someday, I'll tell you about her.

We came home, grabbed a birthday card for Scott's Grandma and went to visit her.  She just turned 80, and the family had an open house for her on Saturday. (we forgot to bring her card with us then)  She's still friends with a group of ladies that she grew up with, and it was sweet to see them sitting together talking.  The smiles on their faces made time melt a little and you could almost see them as teenagers talking about their latest crushes.

Anyway, contrary to the post yesterday, I did have a nice weekend.  Once I let myself move past the BFN, things got a lot sunnier.

And all this leads up to the conversation I had with my OBGYN today.  I OVULATED!!  Holy crap, my body did what it was supposed to do! Yes, it may not have made a baby, but its a step in the right direction.  The doctor told me he was also going to mail me a letter with my results, and I told him I was going to put it up on the fridge (I'll take a picture when I do, too)

So, yes, one part of the month didn't go as planned, but the other part did!  And if that isn't a silver lining, I don't know what is!

Negative

Tested this morning.  Negative.

I ate cake for breakfast. . .

Keep your fingers crossed for the progesterone test results.  Knowing that I ovulated will save this month from totally sucking on the TTC front.

Conflicted

It's Friday Interwebs!!  Yeah for Friday!!

Ok, so here's where I stand in the whole making a baby thing.  I'm pretty sure I ovulated.  But only pretty sure, not 100%.  My OBGYN ordered a progesterone blood draw yesterday when I went in to have my yearly "peek-a-boo" session (aka pap).  He told me the results would be back today.  Which would be awesome, because then I'd know if I should hold out hope that something could have happened this month.

So about 2pm I call in to the office to see if they have the results.  I, of course, have to leave a message (because no one there likes to talk on the phone).  I get a phone call about 4:30pm telling me that she couldn't find the results, so she's sure that means they'll come in Monday.  Sigh.

Now what?  I'll be 12DPO on Sunday.  Do I test then, or wait and see if I ovulated?  Do I want to waste a test if I didn't ovulate? 

I'm so conflicted! 

IPS? Yes, I have some of those

I didn't meant to fall off the edge of the blogsphere, really I didn't.  Last week was crazy at home and at work which left little time for blogging.  I spent what computer time I had commenting for ICLW (which was awesome!) and keeping up with all of you! 

And honestly, it's been a rather boring week for being so crazy.  I was at the courthouse a few times for work, and also doing my job and Dingbats job (she was on vacation).  It wasn't very stressful, but it was busy, and I came home tired every night.

Which is definitely one of my IPS.  I'm absolutely gone by the end of the night, and my lack of housework shows it!  Add exhaustion to the fact that I am going to the bathroom more, have headaches and backaches, and my stomach doesn't want to settle for anything, and Hope starts peeking out of that closet I've got her shut in.

I'm in the middle of the two week wait, and Mother's Day will be 12DPO.  Ironic?  Yes.  Makes me more hopeful that maybe the universe it trying to give me something amazing?  Definitely!  Scares me? Hell yes.

Does anyone have any extra weight I can throw against the Hope closet?  I need her to stay hidden for another week!